Relationships Strategies: An Unconventional Understanding


For many people a satisfying relationship is a main priority.  Love, intimacy, companionship, validation, being heard, trusted and cared for are some of the things human beings require.  Even with all the material comforts life can give us, without companionship, life loses its luster and enjoyment.


Getting into a good relationship can be challenging and maintaining one can become increasingly difficult over time as we, and our partners, change and grow in seemingly different directions.

So what is the factor that makes the beginning of love so intoxicating and how and why does it change over time?




How can an “old” marriage return to exciting romance?

Can dating near-misses and utter disasters change to blossoming romance and possible love?

How can we make the love we have more than it is or has been?


In the animal kingdom, animals give off scents and colorful behavior to send subtle and not so subtle signals to attract their mates, like a peacock spreading its tail feathers. As humans, we give unbelievable amounts of information to others through subconscious behaviors and attitudes.  This is somewhat like body language, but more refined and effective.


“You” are the accumulation of all of your prior experiences and mental conditionings.  These life-long experiences condition your behavior on subtle, non-consciously recognized levels.  The way we speak, walk, dress, our mannerisms and gestures are all conditioned and influenced by our subconscious mind.


We are also subconsciously processing millions of these signals from others when we interact with them.  In this way, there is an entire level of communication going on “behind the scenes”.   When these subtle interactions are called “chemistry” and we can have good or bad chemistry with anyone.  By listening and detecting subconscious motives, not spoken ones, we create better relationships.




I have trained hundreds of couples on how to recreate the “honeymoon” chemistry they had in the beginning as well as train those in search for love how to turn near-miss dating into long lasting romance.  Too often our, or our partner’s, subconscious behavior can sabotage the relationship.  This can happen in our careers and with our children too.


We think we know what others want, but when we apply our conscious intellect to our relationship problems, we stop giving what others truly want.  In the beginning, we left it to our natural, pleasure seeking subconscious and it was easy.  It can be easy again and the honeymoon can start all over.  Whether you’re single and dating, married with children or planning that wedding day, learning relationship’s subconscious language can make the biggest difference of your life.


Through slight modifications in our own behavior, we can illicit positive change in our partner’s behavior.


Scott Spackey is a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, Life-Counselor and CA. Reg. Addiction Specialist  who works with all ages, children to adults, throughout the US and five countries in the EU..    


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